December 21, 2007

Christmas day is fast approaching. I'm sitting in the living room; as I write this, Matthew has challenged Reed to a game of chess, John is standing by to see who is to be the victor. My father has fallen asleep in the recliner, and my grandmother is in the other reading. Charles, as usual, is talking about football; my grandfather is on the phone, and my mother, Allison, and Kathryn are wrapping gifts. Hope is, as usual, baking in the kitchen. It'll be something special, of course; ''as usual''. :)
Celtic Christmas music is playing in the background; now daddy has woken, and is in the kitchen pestering Hope about her cookies; wishing they were done already so he could have one, no doubt. The lights are on, the greenery hung; and finally, I feel that sense of peace, love, and belonging that make Christmas so dear. And now that we have grown, and are moving in different directions, having us all back together makes it even dearer.
Earlier, as we sat around the dinner table; packed in like sardines, knocking elbows with daddy and John, I once again realized the importance of family, and the great blessing I hold in having so many. And again, I feel the Lord's goodness; His love for me.

I made Reed's wild hog sausage, eggs, and homemade biscuits for breakfast. The biscuits turned out better this time than they ever have. That's not saying much, since I only started making biscuits this summer. But at least I'm improving. :)
We had rather a late start today, as we girls had gone out last night to see a movie. We saw August Rush, and though I don't agree with everything in it, it was a sweet movie. After we got out, my mother comes up with a crazy idea: "Why don't we go back and see Enchanted?!" Before I realize that she is, indeed, serious, she rushes back and buys tickets for us all! When we got home around 11:30-12, everyone had gone to bed but John and Charles, who had waited up for us to make sure we got home alright. Wasn't that sweet of them?!
We are having a good time with my grandparents while they are here, and I'm very glad they were able to make the trip from TX. The must leave on Sunday, but I'm grateful for the time we have together.

OK, I have given my spill on family and feelings; now I should check my mail, and get back to the family.
Good night, all you out there.

December 10, 2007

Today I got together with 8 other women of all ages and made candy and cookies; it was lots of fun, and oh boy, were we packed in there! :)

I've been having trouble with my i-tunes, so decided to try to fix it while I was in town with a high-speed internet connection...and guess what? It still won't work! I'm getting rather put out with it.... :)

And, once again...it is too late to think up and post something that is really worth reading. So I'll sign off, and, once again, hope that I'll have some more time tomorrow......I know, it's pathetic. :)

December 8 (Already?!), 2007

Wow, it's the eighth?! :)
I thought I should change my blog layout to something that looked a little more Christmas-ier. :) But this was the best I found. Oh, well....black wasn't all that festive either; at least this one's brighter.

We've been getting busier and busier....I guess that's December for you. So I don't have much time to update my blog or share anything that's been going on, till late in the evening...and then usually I get stuck checking my groups and emails....and then, next thing I know, it's too late to write much of anything, 'cause I need to go to bed; like now. :)
So, once again, I shall try to put something substantial on this tomorrow; but for now, I'll be heading for bed.

December 6, 2007

There are so many things I hope to accomplish; so much I wish to do, before it's to late. There are times I feel the need; there are times when I have a greater sense of urgency than at others. This is one of those times. But what is it that I must do? That is when I am at a loss.....I remember; my whole purpose here is to bring glory to God; so how do I do that? I believe there are things, gifts and blessings He has given me, to aid me in that great purpose. It might be something simple as writing a song, or a whole book; it might be raising cattle, cleaning the house, cooking meals, watching a young couples' children so they can have time together. Whatever I do, it should be done to the glory of God; it should cause others to long for a deep, personal relationship with God, not done with the intent of bringing attention to myself so that others will say, "look at her, she's a great girl!". No, it should 'cause them to say, "Glory to God! Lord, give me that, I want to know You like that! Christ, send Your cleansing rain!"

It's late, and I have to make breakfast in the morning, so I should head to bed. But I hope you will continue to think on this as I will; perhaps we will both be able to fully realize what it means to live your life for Christ, and to bring glory to His name.

December 3, 2007

Let's see...what did I do last week?
Monday I had a practice for the Messiah, and Tuesday evening was the performance. It was a lot of fun, and I hope I can do it again next year. :)
Wednesday, my sisters and I volunteered at a Special Olympics event held on campus. It was such a blessing to work with those people. They were all so cheerful, and sweet.
Thursday was my last 'cello lesson till the end of the Christmas break; so I'll resume sometime in January.

I read something very neat in My Utmost For His Highest yesterday: "I am called to live in perfect relation to God so that my life produces a longing after God in other lives, not admiration for myself." And I wholeheartedly agree with Oswald Chambers there. I pray the Lord will help me to live so; for, as a sinful, selfish girl, I like others to think well of me, and in my own strength, I cannot do it. "Thoughts about myself hinder my usefulness to God." May we all strive to live like this; with our hearts and minds fixed solely on Christ Jesus, our Lord. "God is getting me to the place where He can use me. Let Him do what He likes."

December 2, 2007

Again, I've slacked off on updating this blog. What can I say but that I've been busy, and maybe just a little bit lazy in regard to this blog. :)

Christmas is fast approaching. I've been getting all the decor out this past week, and Kathryn and Reed decked the house out in lights. I love doing these things. But that's not what makes Christmas. We often get caught up in the seasonal festivities, forgetting the true meaning, or rushing through it, if we admit theres' a true meaning to Christmas at all. Even Christians tend to think Christmas is just a feel good time, created for us to have a good time. But December 25 is the day that we recognize that God sent His Son to earth for us. To save us. In today's culture, it is now a struggle to remember that.
I do love the fact, though, that people distribute love more throughout the Christmas season. I think that is one of the reasons I love this time of year so much. On a normal day, you can be in WalMart for two hours and never a smile from anyone. But this month, practically everyone smiles as you walk along; those with buggies fuller (and sometimes emptier) than your own will tell you to go ahead of them in line, no reason but that they feel like doing a good turn to another. Why can't this behavior stretch throughout the year? I have no answer for that, but I wish it would.

For those of you interested, my cat, Smokey, is doing great. She feels (and looks) much better. I'm very thankful to God that it was nothing serious. That might sound petty, but I dearly love my cats, and as I believe God delights in giving us our hearts desires, I believe that He was very good to me, and heard my prayers ahead of time. Anyway, thank you to those who voiced concern and good wishes for her health. It meant much to me. :)

Maybe I will post more tomorrow, but it is getting late now, so I will bid you "Au Revoir"!

November 24, 2007

Wow, a lot has happened in the last four or five days.
Tuesday morning I woke up to a cat and my bed comforter covered in blood. Well, not completely covered, but there was a LOT of blood. At first, I thought it was her paw that was producing so much blood, but I soon ascertained it was actually her mouth. She kept bleeding pretty steadily for two and a half hours; by then I had decided I should bring her in for an emergency visit to the vet. They told me she had a "rodent ulcer'', that she might continue to bleed for two days, gave her a shot and told me I should bring her back in two weeks.
I rushed her back home in time to jump back in the car with my sister, her violin, and my 'cello for our lessons. And I got my 'first' piece of music: Mary had a little lamb. Yep, but hey, it's better than "Twinkle"....or maybe not. :) But it's a piece of music, instead of playing those open strings all the time. I'm grateful for it.
Then Wednesday was partially spent cooking in anticipation for Thanksgiving Day at my Grandparents house. Kathryn, Hope and I all made Apple pies; they made the traditional, and I made an Apple Cider pie....it's a pretty good recipe. Hope also made some Pumpkin Streusel pies, those are different....but they went over well for everyone but those with braces, since the pies contained nuts. :)
Thursday morning I got up early and made, surprise, more pies! The traditional Pumpkin/Maple pie. I also made some pumpkin bread for breakfast while my brothers peeled and cut potatoes for mashing. And let me tell you, they broke the record for fastest potato peelers ever! We also made a green salad with manderin oranges and glazed pears; and got the stuff together for the much-longed-for relish tray, our favorite Thanksgiving dish! We packed everything up and headed out. Everyone else in the family brought their various dishes to my grandparents, and we had a feast. The weather was somewhere between 30-40 degrees, and it was VERY cold. All the young people, which was just my siblings, one cousin, and myself, went outside to work off some of the food we'd eaten to make room for more food. We played frisbee for a while, then my brother's taught Hope and I to play football while Kathryn took pictures. We had a lot of fun, a great time. Then the game come on TV, and I was bored out of my head. Everyone else in my family is crazy about football, and while I will pop in occasionally to see the score, I'm not a great fan. But I endured the next two or more hours in as many different ways as I could think of, and then we all went back out to play it again. :)
We haven't been doing a lot yesterday and today; the guys have gone out hunting both days, and my 'baby' brother, Reed, got a wild hog. It will be nice to have the sausage through the winter. We girls went downtown shopping for a few hours today, in the rain, got pretty cold; my mother and sister Kathryn both bought stuff, but Hope and I escaped with our money still in pocket. :)
Well, I have to get up early tomorrow; it's Sunday, and since I'm a member of our praise team, I'm supposed to leave our house with my father, Hope, and brother Charles by 8:00 am. I'd like to be up by 6, so I have time to spend with the Lord first, and eat breakfast, and not have to rush through my dress. :) So all that means I should go to bed pretty soon; and I'll 'call it a post'.

November 19, 2007

Here it is, the week of Thanksgiving. The nights are chilly, but the days have been mostly very nice; warm and sunny. Enough to keep my plants alive. But I have to bring them in every night to avoid freezing.
My cats spend the nights inside now; as opposed to the cold outdoors. Of course, they wake me up in the middle of the night occasionally; as they dislike each other immensely, both jealous of the attention I give the other, and sometimes pick two or three in the morning as a prime time for a sibling fight. I get up, break it up, and go promptly back to bed. My black one, Smokey, spends most of her time lying on the rug in front of the french doors, where she can get plenty of sunshine in the day; and tries to smuggle her way into the bathroom closet to sleep on top of the towels during the night. My Duchess, a gorgeous orange and white, almost persian looking cat, spends most of her daylight hours out hunting away from home; but usually she comes back in the evening to spend the night curled up at my feet. Despite their quirks, I love them both dearly. I'm hoping that my dog, Sebastian, a Britney Spaniel, and they will get along well; but as I don't have Sebastian yet, and have no idea when that will happen, I don't worry about it much. :)

My friend and I finished our study of Rebekah today. Her story appears through Genesis 24; 25:19-34; 26:1-17, 34-35; and 27. Interesting to me was the difference there seemed to be in Rebekah from the time she was first approached by Abraham's servant, and the time she encouraged Jacob to deceive his father. One thing I saw was the similarity with Sarah. Like Sarah, God had told Rebekah what would happen in the future; but when it didn't seem that it would happen, or come quickly enough, Rebekah, like Sarah, took matters into her own hands, deciding that God needed a little help from her. It is a sad fact that as women, we all too often grow impatient and decide to take matters into our own all-too-incapable hands. Why can't we just wait on the Lord's timing? Why must we always chomp at the bit; rush headlong into situations we ultimately find we can't handle? David encourages us in Psalms 25 repeatedly, and in 27:14, to wait for the Lord; "Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." Waiting for the Lord is rarely easy. Waiting requires strength, and courage, and faith. Strength, to hold us back from jumping ahead; courage, for fear comes with the unknown; and faith, that God will indeed bring about what He has spoken. May God grant you and I all three, and may we 'be strong', let our 'heart(s) take courage' and 'wait for the Lord'.

November 2, 2007

Zooks! (to borrow an expression from the Scarlet Pimpernel.) How did I let this happen again?!!!!
Oh, well, it's not the end of the world. I just haven't updated my blog in a while. So what, it's not like I have a bunch of people depending on my writing something profound every day. I guess then I must be OK.
Flag football and volleyball seasons are both over for us, so life will be slowing down. At least, I hope it will. You never know though. :)
Lots of cooking going on at our house; first, we have a reunion tomorrow and supposed to be taking three dishes. Then, we're getting together with friends Sunday afternoon for a day of music, volleyball, elk hunt picture viewing, and the Patriots vs. Colts game. A busy schedule planned out, that. We'll have close to two dozen people, and lunch and supper. Anyway, I cooked away at a prize-winning broccoli salad this evening that has to chill, and tomorrow will come a lasagna and hash brown casserole. As well as chili to put in the crock pot while we're at church Sunday for lunch. Oh yeah, and I have to figure out two desserts...I have no idea what I'll decide on that. :)
Well, it's getting late; I've updated my blog; and bed is calling my name, so I guess I'll answer it; I have to get up early tomorrow. Oh, but first, I have to go pull the elk meat out of the freezer, so that it'll be defrosted for me to use in the morning....better go do that now.

October 13, 2007

It's funny; how life goes on. You may feel at some point that you'll never get past the difficulty you're facing, but you do. Life goes on.
I was looking back on the past year or two; and felt overwhelmed with love. My dear friend who passed away this summer, Ms Babs, accompanied me on the piano at my graduation; I found her name next to mine in the program. I found a card my best friend had sent me; reminding me of all that we've shared together, and who we are in Christ. Just little things, but they play such big roles....and after reading, and remembering, I felt, as I said, so overwhelmed with love, for them and from them. And I realize that all this love would not be possible but for Christ-"We love, because He first loved us." More than words, my friends, more than words.
Sometimes I am so driven by 'one of these days', by the thought that 'someday I shall have my own house', and let myself get carried away, stressed out and just plain mean about things going on at home, mostly, that it's just not as clean, not as well furnished, and not as perfect as I'd like. Yes, some people don't clean up their own messes as they should always; and yes the sofa and armchairs are falling apart after nearly twenty years and seven+ kids; and yes, we can't open all the windows in the house on nice days like today because if we did they'd fall apart. But are all these things sufficient excuse for me to be short-tempered with almost every member in my family? I should say not. My parents have been replacing things on this old house for years now, they do what they can when they can. One of the pillars holding up the front porch was rotting away, it needed to be replaced, so we'll have to wait on the windows a bit longer. So what? The windows aren't going to collapse, hurt someone and cause damage to the house. They can wait. And I can be patient. "To every thing there is a season, and a perfect time under the sun."
I was so happy last fall; it wasn't difficult in the least to be loving, patient and interested in the doings of my family members. Love flowed through our house and poured out the cracks in our walls and our bad windows. It seemed the well springs of love dried up over the summer; but no more. I need to start spreading that love back around, making sure I'm getting it from the only True and Pure source; Jesus Christ.
And I've been just short of miserable this summer and fall; is it because I've been trying to haul up water from the dirty, slime-covered pond out back of our house? That water might be alright for the animals, but it's poison for the people I hold dear. It's time I stopped forcing it down their throats, and gave them the pure water of Christ.
It's time I stopped living for myself.

October 10, 2007

I finished Crooked House today; that one will leave you tied in knots as to who did it. All the clues were there, if you would only see them, but it left me clueless till the very end.
I am now reading Ordeal By Innocence. These are all short stories, in one volume. So that's why I've been able to finish them quickly. :)

My brothers' last game is tomorrow; it's also an away. So we're packing up the family to watch their final game in another town.....I know, very sad. :) I'm sure it will be great though. Anyway, maybe I'll have something more interesting to post then, 'cause I sure don't now. And rather than bore you with trivial details to practically nothing, I'll "call it a post." :)

October 9, 2007

I was sorely disappointed in the Seven Dials Mystery. I didn't have anything figured out; which doesn't bother me much, I like it when I can't figure the whole mystery out before the rest of the characters (I can usually figure out most murders and such long before the middle of the story); but she didn't just not give you necessary information, she gave you false information. Very misleading. And then of course, I'm just not happy with the way it turned out. :)
I'm starting Crooked House now; I certainly hope it's as good as the last-or should I say, better than the last. I did really enjoy Seven Dials right up until the last two chapters.

My lessons for today got moved to Thursday, so I'll have a mostly quiet day at home, for once. That will be so nice. I have some pork loin I'm planning on fixing up for supper; also some sweet potatoes that need to be used. I'll probably do a salad with it, and think up something fast and easy for dessert.
I also need to clean out the refrigerator, microwave and other various small appliances in the kitchen. Sometimes I wish those everyday things didn't have to be done, or would do themselves; but then I remember how it was when I was attending college, and I wished so much for the time to do those things. Ironic, isn't it? :)

Well, after writing the above earlier, my day changed drastically. I had just cut up the pork loin and started it to marinate, when my youngest brother came running up to the house, with the message for me to come help the other guys in the family with the cattle. Haha-dryly. That took out a couple of hours in my ''leisurely'' day. I came back up covered in dirt and manure, took a shower, and tried to continue supper preparations. But wouldn't you know it, my dad wants to go out and do our bible study now rather than around seven or eight this evening. This is certainly giving me a good opportunity to exercise patience and a good attitude. So I'm going to smile now, and do my best not to succumb to a ''desperaging'' attitude. :) On the plus side, the cattle have all been wormed and etc. for the next couple months, which means I won't have to be trying to do that on my own when the guys are gone. That's definitely a plus.

October 8, 2007

Yikes! I can't believe I haven't posted for-let me count-four days! :) Major neglect there....

So, we celebrated my dad's birthday Friday. My brother and his wife came out, and I think my dad enjoyed it. I had a pretty tough time shopping for him, but finally came up with something....

I am reading Agatha Christi's Seven Dials Mystery, so far so good. I just finished Frank Peretti's Monster-that one was kinda' weird, I'll have to think about it some....
And still on my Proverbs 31 study. We're doing verses 24-28; I found verse 25 so cool, for lack of a better word. :) "Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future." There's a lot there, a lot to ponder. And ponder I shall.

I know had something substantial to post, but my feeble mind has already forgotten it, go figure. :) So I shall hope to remember it, and post later. For now, I shall end, and, of course, call it a post.

October 4, 2007

Well, there was no entry yesterday because Blogger wouldn't let me sign in...

We had volleyball practice again today-actually there was supposed to be a game with some girls from Tupelo, but they never showed up.
The guys also had a football game; but shortly before half-time, there was an electric malfunction, we lost all the lights, and the game had to be called off. Bummer. The plus side was that we weren't out till after nine. :)

My dad's birthday was yesterday; I think we are going to try to celebrate it tomorrow. I also need to get out and shop for him.

Well, I'm tired; and still need to jump in the shower, I'm pretty dirty from playing V-Ball for a couple hours in the heat today....And I need to wake up early tomorrow morning to make breakfast. So I'll call it a night. Or a post.

October 2, 2007

So, here it is, October. OK, so it started yesterday. But it is October. The weather is getting cooler, the leaves are turning to orange, yellow and red-or that's what is supposed to be happening...true, the temperature does go down in the evenings, but about nine the next day, it starts warming back up; and the leaves are NOT turning. They're still green. Mostly.

I met a friend from college today for coffee, it was a really neat time. I enjoyed it so much, and hope she did too. :) We were able to share some verses with each other, and found a mutual love for Jonathon and his relationship with David. :)

I was reading in my bible today, looking up some verses on depression. Yes, I deal with depression sometimes; not the suicidal kind; but the 'down in the dumps today' kind. These are some of the verses I found:
Psalm 42:11-"Why are thou cast down, O my soul? And why art thou disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God."
Isaiah 26:3-"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee; because he trusts in Thee."
And here's a quote from C.S. Lewis that I found; "Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done..."
Too often, I try to rely on myself. It never works, but I seem to forget that each time I try it again. So here I am, again, after yet another failed attempt at relying on myself; resolving yet again to trust and rely on Christ.
Along with trust and reliance on oneself comes depression, I find, every time. The Lord isn't able to keep me in perfect peace when my mind isn't stayed on Him; when I'm not trusting in Him. And when I'm not in "Perfect Peace", you can bet I'm in depression. About my family, friends, house, myself and my life.
But "I shall yet praise Him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God" and I will "Hope in God", and I will 'stay my mind on Him' and 'trust in Him'. I shall choose to rely on God ''every day as if nothing had yet been done''.

The Various Duties of My Week...

I thought I should probably update my blog....but so much has been happening, I don't know where to start, or even if I can; my brain feels scrambled. :)

I've been kitten-sitting for my brother and sister-in-law this past weekend, lots of fun in that.
My cello finally arrived this past Tuesday, but was in need of a few changes; so a friend is working on that for me.
Volleyball season is progressing.....actually fairly well, too.
I've been finding out how to do different things here on my blog...lots more fun! :)

My study of Proverbs 31 with my friend is coming close to the close. :) We have one more week, I think. Then it'll be on to something else, I guess. But it's been very interesting...I've enjoyed it immensely, my eyes have been opened to a few things I've never noticed before. I've been looking at some things that Nancy Leigh DeMoss has to say on the chapter, and that's been cool.

I'm sitting her in the campus Barnes & Noble with free wireless connection, waiting to be picked up by my mother and sisters.....I've been done with my downloads for quite a while now, it went a lot faster than it does at home. :) I just got off the phone with them, they said they're about ten minutes away, so I better close down. At least I can say I 'updated' my blog... :)

The Military Ball

Well, I did cater tonight; rather, this afternoon into the evening....I am SO tired. But it was lots of fun. It was the Columbus Air Force Annual Military Ball, so everything was pretty fancy. It was great being a part of it, and of course, I got to see many of the beautiful gowns worn by the women, and they had a military band playing, which was pretty cool to listen to. Yeah, I feel dead-beat tired, but it was fun. And of course, I'm not going to list all the secrets that go into the catering business, or the close calls we had, but everything turned out 'swell'. :)
Now, if I could just go to sleep after all that 'excitement'....

Jeep Wrangler and "She'll Go On You"

My father is considering buying a friends jeep wrangler. Yep, another vehicle in our drive. But hey, the bright side is that I might get to drive it most....maybe.... :) As the eldest, I've been driving longer than the other kids...six years....Kathryn, fortunately, likes driving the Nissan XT, or something like that...My father informed the guys that they wouldn't be driving anything but our old suburban and his ford truck for some years to come...and Hope has yet to drive by herself in any of the vehicles, so dad wants her to wait a bit on that one...So, that leaves me. At least it's a step closer to a truck. I told dad I'd be happy to drive his truck instead, but he wasn't too keen on that. :) I wonder why......

I feel totally burnt out on life...but know that once Sunday rolls around, I'll feel much better...at least until next Wednesday.... :) (shrug and sigh).
I'm meeting my friend, Christi, tomorrow. I'm looking so forward to that, we haven't been able to visit just us for quite a long time. (The wording there wasn't too complicated for you, was it? :)
Hopefully, we'll be able to catch up on each other's lives and see what the Lord has been teaching us over the summer and into the fall.

I'm listening to Josh Turner as I write, and his song, She'll Go On You, just started playing. That song never ceases to make my sisters' and I pause for a moment and think. It's very true; you need to appreciate those loved ones you have with you, 'cause sooner than you know, they'll be gone, and you won't be able to tell them how much you love them. I usually start to cry when I hear it...because it's then I realize that I don't say those important things, like 'I love you', and 'thank you' often enough. And I always resolve to do a better job. In my own strength, I never can. But if I ask the Lord to help me, keeping my eyes on Him, it never fails.

Ramblings...

I made my Spanish dishes again tonight. But I did cut down on the chili powder. :)

Today was my third cello lesson. I'm going to order one of my own tomorrow, as I've been using my teacher's instrument up until now. Let me tell you; playing an instrument as complicated as the cello is no walk in the park. At least for me it ain't. :)

I spent the thirty minutes waiting for my lesson reading English Literature Of The Late Seventeenth Century. I'm just on the background of the age right now. It's fairly boring...but something I must persevere through....

We have bible study tomorrow, so that means that in the morning I'll be doing my 'major' cleaning...Wednesday is one of the few mornings I have at home...and I find it hard to work like that in the afternoon, I'm usually too tired.

Well...I don't have anything constructive to say, so I'll just call it a post... :)

Proverbs 31

I am studying Proverbs 31:10-15 this week with a friend. I used to always get discouraged when I read this passage; I mean, how could any woman who wasn’t Wonder Woman get all that done in one day?!
Fact is, she didn’t. Those were the works of a lifetime.
The point is, she is a diligent, hard-working woman, not given to idleness. And her heart trusts in the Lord God of her salvation. The actions, the abilities that she exhibits are not what makes her Godly, or virtuous. Her relationship with God is what makes her Godly and virtuous. Those actions and abilities are signs of her relationship; they spring from her love for the Lord and for her family.
Another interesting thing was the meaning of the word virtuous. It means strength; often translated as 'army' or 'wealth'; also meaning moral strength, or strength of character.
We will be studying Proverbs 31 over the next six weeks....we should come up with a lot of cool insight...I'm looking forward to it. :)

Live, Love, Laugh...

This saying has been driving it's way inside of me this weekend.....You really do have to take time to live, to love, to laugh. And I find that all to often of late...I don't.
So I'm resolving to take time to live, love, and laugh this week. One great way of doing that is a to have a tea party. And that's what I did. I invited my two sisters, Hope and Kathryn, and my mother. Hope made mini cakes, Kathryn made the tea, I had donut holes and the china (Kathryn actually had to bring her teapot, as mine is no longer in commission); and my mother just came. :)
We had a good time, laughed a lot. Lived, and loved. I realized that I want to make time for those simple things in my life. Not that my pace is not hectic.
Monday's I meet with a friend for some Bible study, and talk; we visit about the different things going on in our lives. I also help coach a teens volleyball team.
Tuesdays I have cello lessons.
Wednesday is our church's women's Bible study.
Thursdays I go to another friends house to help out with her kids, get some practical experience since I don't have any of my own yet. I also use that day as my 'in town day'. I try to run any errands, and meet anyone in town that I need to, or sometimes it's just 'want'. :)
That leaves me Friday that I don't have any thing I have to do. Usually. This Friday I'm going to be working with a caterer, doing a military ball. Should be fun. I have to be there from three in the afternoon, till after midnight. It will be a long day.
And Saturday evening I'm supposed to babysit for another friend.....My life is definitely busy. This week in particular.

I am currently studying/researching English Literature, for my book. I love literature, and poetry in particular, and wish to include it, but as my book is set in the late 1700's, I need to understand it from that century's perspective. It's been interesting so far. I still like Shakespeare best, I think. :)

"Don't Be Disparaged."

Went to Tupelo today with Kathryn and my mom....had a really good time, till we got home. Then 'disparagement' set in; the house was a mess. Well, not really a mess, but not as clean as I would have liked. I decided I would check my mail, write a quick note here, then roll up my sleeves and dive in. Also need to put up the summer decor and get out the fall. So I'm not going to let this get me down, I was in a good mood before entering the house, and I refuse to lose it.
"I'm off to the races!"

Autumn is coming!

Fall is here! At least, the fall weather; even though autumn doesn't officially start till the 23. Today we opened up all the windows, turned off the air conditioners, and let the delightful, cool breezes waft their way through the house. The sky was so blue, and so clear; the clouds so white, so billowy....it looked like the sky stretched forever.

I've been listening to Martina McBride today...my favorites are: Anyway, I'll Still Be Me, and House Of A Thousand Dreams. These are awesome songs, and say so much that is in my heart right now.

This was my verse of the day on facebook, and I thought it so appropriate for today's entry;
"Though you have not seen Him, you love Him; and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." I Peter 1:8-9

"Disparaging Week"

This was a pretty little flower, but a bad shot. :)
I'm fighting a pretty bad headache; trying to resist the urge to scream my head off, as it probably wouldn't help anyway. lol.
Not that it entitles me to whine and complain...but the forces of nature and my headache have conspired against me today. Because, on top of my headache, I'm also dealing with allergies. I've had a pretty bad week. Agghhhhhhhh! No, it didn't really help.

I'm reading Tolstoy's War And Peace. No idea if it's a good book or not, but it was recommended to me as a classic. And it's taking forever for me to get through, I think I'm finally on chapter five, it's due this next wednesday, and I've already rechecked it once.

I have a million different things pulling at me at once. Probably contributing to the headache, no surprise there. Right now, I'm struggling to have the right attitude. And picking my battles wisely. I'm losing most of them at the time.
One of my greatest friends is coming over tomorrow night. I'm so glad, because then we can philosophize, which always makes me feel better.

OK, enough whining for now. Things to be grateful for; since I've pretty much hit rock bottom on my finances, I should be, and am, glad that I've sold a steer. If only it brings a good price, that should help me out for a while. But the cattle prices are down a lot since last year-wait, I said I'm not going to complain anymore, didn't I?

Sometimes I wish we could just go back to simple times. I've been watching Wives and Daughters; A really good movie.

Well, I've gotta' go; have some more errands to run, and it's awfully tempting to just whine some more on here. I need to work on my attitude before I see or talk to anyone. :)

My Week

I went out of town to visit a friend of mine this week. It was an awesome time! She got married last spring, so it was good seeing her again, and getting to know her husband a little too. We went shopping one day; got some great bargains! They also showed me a house in their family that pre-dates the Civil War! That was amazing! I'm an avid fan of the Civil War, am actually writing a book on it, so try to get my hands on anything from the time.
I'm considering taking up the cello; found one for a decent price, and also one of the staff at State, from Romania actually, has consented to give me lessons. I'm excited!
I can't believe it's already September! This is crazy! Where does time go?
I'm reading a book by Debra White Smith, titled "What Jane Austen Taught Me About Love And Romance". It's very interesting. She uses I Cor. 13:4-8 and compares each attribute to some one of Austin's characters. I recommend it; she uses lots of humor in her writing; I've enjoyed it immensely.
Well, I'm the only one at home right now, so that means I must feed all the animals; our four dogs, bizillion cats, and horses, cattle and ducks if they need it. They've already waited quite late, so I'd better get out there now.

Becoming Jane

We watched the movie today with a couple friends. I really liked it; excepting a few scenes. Stuff that wasn't really in keeping with Jane Austins' character, and then there was one scene that should have rated the movie R, in my opinion. So while I can't recommend it based on that, otherwise it was good. If you do plan on watching it, I'd recommend waiting till it was on DVD, so you can skip that scene, instead of walking out of the cinema for a time. We then had some interesting conversation about it. Warning! Spoilers. :) Our first problem was, if Tom Lefroy really did care for her, then why ever didn't he say, "Wait for me. I'll make my way to support you and my family, without my uncles help if need be"! Instead he goes and gets married to somebody else! Yeah.... Then there was Mr. Wisley. Why didn't she marry him?! He was so obviously above Lefroy...He actually took time to think before he spoke, and people wrote him off as slow! Or worse...And his conversation was very intelligent...He was so much more of a man than Lefroy! Lefroy may have been a little more exciting, or 'stirring' to ones emotions....but really, is that what's important in marriage, or life, even? There's so much more. And personally, her whole stance on not marrying somebody she didn't love...love is a choice, not a feeling. As Mr. Wisley said, "Affection is a flower that takes time to blossom." I'm not saying she should have married him right off, but given it some time at least. Oh, well, I needed to get those pent up, angry feelings out somehow. :) There's my tirade for today.
Flag Football season starts tomorrow; along with Volleyball for the girls. Unfortunately, I'm too old for the Volleyball team, maybe they'll let me assistant coach!

Some More Ramblings...

Well, here it is, more than a week since I last wrote. Ha-ha, the story of my life....I just seem to get so busy; and then I lost my Internet connection for a while there too.
My grandfather turns 80 tomorrow, so we went over to their place and celebrated with him today; all his sons, their wives, and their children. It was very nice, and just such a special time to spend all together. We made homemade ice cream, always a plus... :) The guys played football; meaning my four brothers and my cousin's husband, Nick. My Dad, and another cousin, Cody, even joined in the game some. My sisters and I played Frisbee with Cody some, and joined the married granddaughters later in watching the football game. My brother got married a year ago last March; they're expecting in January; and my cousin got married this past July. It's a weird feeling, being the oldest single in the family now..... :) But I guess I'm not suffering too much.... :)
My parents just had their 30th, and took a trip to the Smokies. I was 'president', and my twin brothers were 'head of security' while they were gone. :) We had a good time. My parents brought back little somethings for everyone, mugs for the four youngest, a biography of a native from the Smokies for Kathryn, and a book of Mountain Family Recipes for me. I was, and still am, very excited about that one....can't wait to try some of those; though others, like the chitlins, I'm content to leave well enough alone. :)
I guess I'm in a 'philosophical' type of mood, because I've been doing a lot of that (in my head) lately....I'm missing the day's when my friend Christi and I used to stay up all night doing that. lol. But I'll try to restrain myself for the time being. I am so glad she's finished up with one of her jobs, maybe we'll have some time to see each other again.
So, I have like a million books I'm supposed to be reading on my bookshelf. I've been reading Richard Blackaby's Putting A Face On Grace. It's really good, but since I'm reading so many different books right now, it's taking me forever to get through any of them. I'm also reading Nancy Leigh DeMoss's Holiness, just started it, so can't say much yet. And I'm still reading A Sacred Romance. That one's taking a long time, probably because it's so deep. I am aching to read Elliot' Let Me Be A Woman, I've heard so much good about it, but am making myself hold back on that one till I finish one of the others.
I had been making a lot of progress last week on the book I'm writing, The Count; but this week it seems that inspiration is gone. Oh, well. Sometimes it comes, sometimes it goes. I guess that's just the life of a struggling, amateur author. :)

A Post

OK, after that horribly long post last week, I thought I should give y'all some time to actually read it (and possibly try the recipes:).
Well, it seems Wednesdays may be the time for me to post on my blog. As some of you probably already know, I have dial-up, and it takes forever to get anything done, so I don't always fool with this.....
The Lord has been teaching me allot this week.
I didn't realize it until recently, but I seem to have a problem with being grateful/thankful. Verbally, at least. But an older woman whom I look up to immensely encouraged me to practice being grateful. She's gonna check me on it Sunday.....It adds a whole new dimension to it when you know some one's gonna ask you how you did this past week......
Well, I have to make a run by the grocery, so this isn't a long post, but at least it is a post. :)

Spanish Tuesday

Well, I had to change my plans a little this week.....so Tuesday turned into the Spanish/Mexican day. And I think I may say that it all turned out a success. :)
For breakfast we had
Mexicana Brunch Pie

5 large eggs
2 Tbls. melted butter or margerine
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 ts. Baking powder
1 cup cream-style cottage cheese
8 oz. shredded Monterey Jack cheese (with peppers if you wish it to be spicier).
4.5 oz. chopped green chiles

Beat eggs, melted butter, flour, and baking powder in a large mixing bowl; beat at medium speed with an electric mixer until mixture is blended. (I used a hand-whip, I don't think it made that much of a difference.)
Stir in cottage cheese, Monterey Jack cheese, and chiles; pour mixture into a well-greased 9-inch pie plate.
Bake, uncovered, at 400 degrees for 10 minutes; reduce heat to 350 degrees, and bake 20 more minutes or until mixture is set. Cut into wedges. Yield: 8 servings.
(I added Canadian Bacon for a little more substance; of course that will change the nutrition facts.)
Nutrition facts: (this is for you, Ellen!) Per serving: calories-304; fat-22g; cholesterol-222mg; sodium-581mg.

Dinner was Spanish Quiche

3 7.5 inch flour tortillas
16 oz. Refried Beans
4 oz. diced green chiles
1/2 cup sliced green onions
1/4 lb. reduced fat cheddar cheese, grated
7 eggs
1/4 cup skim milk
1/4 ts. paprika

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray 9-inch pie pan with non-stick cooking spray. Cut 2 tortillas in half and place each half in the pan so that the rounded edge is 1/4 inch above the rim. Place the remaining tortilla in the center of the pan. Spread beans over tortillas. Top with chiles, onions, and cheese. Mix eggs with milk and pour over top. Sprinkle with paprika. Bake 5o minutes or until knife inserted in center comes out clean. Let sit for 10 minutes before cutting into 8 wedges. Yield: 8 servings.
Nutrition Facts: Per serving: calories-199.3; fat-10.6g; protein-12.9g; carbs-12.3; cholesterol-161mg; sodium-280 mg.

Corn Salad

2 cans white shoe-peg corn (I prefer the mexican-style, if you use that the tomato and green onions are optional)
1 med. tomato
green onions
2-3 heaping Tbls. Mayo
garlic powder, salt, and pepper to taste.
Combine all ingredients and refrigerate overnight.

Spanish Rice

3 Tbls. vegetable oil
2 cups uncooked long-grain rice
2 large green peppers, chopped. (I didn't have any, so used 3 cayenne peppers, it definitely made it spicy!)
2 large stalks celery, chopped
2 med. onions; finely chopped
2 ts. cumin seeds, crushed
1-1 1/2 ts. salt
1 ts. chili powder
1/2 ts. pepper
1/4 ts. garlic powder
6 cups water
8 oz. tomato sauce
Heat oil over med-high heat in a heavy Dutch oven (if you don't have a Dutch oven, make do, I did!); add rice and next 8 ingredients to Dutch oven, and cook until rice is browned, stirring often.
Stir in water and tomato sauce; bring to a boil. Reduce heat to med.; cover and cook 25 minutes or until liquid is absorbed and rice is tender. Yield: 8 side-dish servings.
Nutrition Facts per serving: cal-266; fat-6.1g; chol-0mg; sodium-330mg.

Spicy Okra-Tomato-Corn Saute

1/2 sm. onion, chopped
1/2 Tbls. vegetable oil
16 oz. frozen okra, thawed (I used fresh, but then you have to cook it first)
1 cup corn
10 oz. Ro-Tel tomatoes & green chiles, undrained
1 ts. sugar
3/4 ts. salt
1/4 ts. pepper
Saute chopped onion in hot veg. oil in a large non-stick skillet over med-high heat 5 minutes or until tender. Add okra, cook, stirring ocasionally, 5 more minutes. Stir in corn and remaining ingredients, and cook 5 minutes or until thoroughly heated. Server immediately.

There was quite a bit of dinner conversation over this meal, and half of it was centered on the meal. If you like spicy, mexican type dishes, this is a must-go!

Meals

I decided to go ahead and plan out my meals this week.
I'm in charge of food for two days, Tuesdays and Fridays; so Tuesday is Spanish/Mexican day. I'll be making a Mexicana Brunch Pie in the morning; lunch is always leftovers or sandwiches; and for supper I'm planning Spanish Quiche, Mexican Corn Salad, and Spanish Rice. I couldn't find a Spanish/Mexican dessert, so I'm going with a Deluxe Cheesecake.
Friday we'll have Buttermilk Biscuits and Creamy Egg Scramble; and supper will be something with venison as the main dish, haven't figured that one out yet. :) We'll also have Lemon Dill Potatoes and Broccoli Cheese Casserole, and Chocolate Pecan Torte for dessert.
I'm pretty happy with my meal plans for this week; we had most of the ingredients on hand already, and the few we don't are pretty inexpensive. I'm hoping to post the recipes later, and I'll definitely let you know how they turn out. :)

Personality Types

These are some pretty cool sites. I thought I'd post them for you, and if you happen to be someone I know personally, I would love it if you left me (either here, email or facebook) your name and type. I thought it would be nice to understand each other a little better. :) My type is ISTP.
http://www.personalitytype.com/quiz.asp
Once you've taken the above to determine your type, take these; they'll tell you a little about yourself (as if you didn't already know!). =)
http://www.personalitypage.com/portraits.html and http://www.typelogic.com/.

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did. Special thanks to Sam for sending me these links in the first place. :)

Runnning

Verse Of The Day
"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way that you may win. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training....exercises self-control in all things....They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize." I Corinthians 9:24-27

How are you running? Are you exercising self-control in all things? These words of Paul's convict me every time I read them. My exhortation today is, run in such a way as to receive the prize; run with aim, and self-control.
I write this, with the knowledge in mind that I need myself to do this. It is not because of anyone else, but what I see in my own life. I realize more and more as I grow older how impossible it is to do anything on my own. Thus, this is a simple way of reminding myself to take it to God today; to trust and lean on Him. And if it helps you as well, then praise the Lord!

I sprained my knee slightly yesterday evening, running. I stepped into a hole....how embarrassing! It was pretty stiff this morning when I got up, but as I've moved around, it has felt better. Perhaps this is what sparked 'running races'. :)

Overcoming the World

Verse Of The Day
"In the world you shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." John 16:33
"An average view of the Christian life is that it means deliverance from trouble. It is deliverance in trouble, which is very different. 'He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High...there shall no evil befall thee.'" Oswald Chambers.

Oh, the truth to these words! I must confess that all to often, I lose sight of that simple truth. In the trials of this world, I often become overwhelmed, wondering how I could ever hope to stay afloat. I forget that I can't, not on my own. But Christ has overcome the world. And in His secret place I am safe. But I have to go there. I have to accept His help, in fact, give everything to Him. And then in that place shall no evil befall me.

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have it's perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind." James 1:2-6

Am I willing to trust Him every day of my life? To let Him test me, producing endurance? To admit my lack of wisdom, and humbly ask Him for more? And to ask in faith, without the nagging doubts that so often assail us? Am I willing to 'be of good cheer', with joy in my heart when the hard times come?
These questions must be asked. Hopefully, you're answer is yes to all of them. But while that is what I really want my answer to be, sometimes I find I do not live my life according to that answer. You have to be willing to let God grow that desire in you, to seek Him daily and cultivate that relationship with Him. I find that I have to constantly rededicate my life to Him and to His will. I wonder, does there ever come a time when we don't have to do that? The answer seems to be no; you will have to make decisions for Christ every single day of your life. We live in a sinful world, full of temptations; and unless you live as a hermit, miles from any human contact all your life, you will be tempted by this world to turn from Christ. You should not feel guilty for being tempted, but you should for giving in. I want to encourage you to fight temptation; to continually seek His face. To persevere in the trials, leaning on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith. Knowing that He has indeed overcome the world.

No time for them all!

Ok, so I haven't updated this blog in a while. I can't write much now; but a word of caution to you would be bloggers: Don't get signed up for more than just two different blogs...at the most. One would be ideal. I know, different blog sites offer different 'desirable' things, but it's really not worth it, because it's almost impossible to keep them all up. :) Experience talking.
One day, soon I hope, I will post a nice, big, something for you to read, but today is not that day. :) Hope you have a good one.

Strep Throat

I have strep throat. And I can tell you now that it's not any fun. :) It's messed up alot of my plans for this week; and I feel tired ALL the time. And hungry, but I don't feel like eating, as that makes the throat feel worse.......Yes, I am afraid I've turned into an invalid. :) Hopefully I'm not too bad to my family around me. John has it too, so we've been trying to entertain each other. But there isn't too much to do, besides watch TV, play on the gamecube, and read; and that gets pretty old pretty fast. :) But trying to do any work tires us out so much. Hopefully it's not going to last to long. Even writing this little bit has tired me out, so I'm going to go lie down again. At least this way, I should be able to catch up on my sleep. :)

Just An Update, And Hopes For This Summer

So I haven't updated this blog for a while, and I thought I probably should. :)
The summer has been flying by, and I haven't gotten to half of the things I wanted/needed to get done. But I have gotten to that other half :-), so am grateful for that. My garden is all planted and struggling along beautifully, lol. Still waiting on painting my room (which I shall be moving out of at the end of the month. But hey, at least my sisters' will be able to enjoy it, and I will as well when I move back in about a year. If I'm still here at home then; and I believe I will be if the Lord doesn't come back or take me home :). Still a little foggy about what color to paint it, as it's a bit difficult to get four women to agree on one color. lol. Trying to keep up on the cooking. Lately I've been able to put up green beans and corn. I think I will get to do some tomatoes as well; and if I can find some jars I'm planning on putting up some of our crab-apples. Should keep me fairly busy, for a little while at least.
I have been very grateful for the Lord's strength this past month. I cannot see how we could have made it this far without His help. The verses that have been sticking out to me of late are all about His mercies, righteousness, and loving-kindnesses. Psalm 98, 95:3,4 and 90:1,2. I have worked on a couple songs as well, based on thoughts and feelings from the past month; but doubt if I will ever share all of them, as most of them are between me and the Lord.
I'm also hoping to get some more work done on my book(s) this summer, so better start soon or it'll be over before I ever start. :)

Today's Update

Just a quick update. We just got back from visitation. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be. :(
I have to head back over to practice music at 12:00. So that means I have 30 min to spend with Jesus, and then it's on my way.
"Behold, God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid; for the Lord God is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation."

The God Of Love And Peace

Well, we're back from church. The Lord's presence was SO strong there. The praise team leaders had put together a collection of Ms. Babs favorite songs. It was nearly impossible to sing those songs without thinking of her; it was so tough to sing without totally breaking down. Which I definitely didn't want to do, as I'm a member of our praise team, and I didn't want to make it harder on the church body or her family by bawling up front through all the songs. But it was also so...I don't know the words to explain....but it was wonderful...beautiful...amazing. And the elder who spoke, his message was great. He spoke of Psalm 46;Romans 11:33-12:2; and Matt. 13:20; About God being a God of war, ready to do war for us, the Lord of hosts; but also the God of peace, and we can rest in that peace. But we have to choose. It's like the song, "Blessed be Your Name"-'My heart will choose to say, blessed be Your name'. He also spoke of being transformed, being completely changed through Christ. It was really good.
So now that we're through the tough part of today, we have to make it through tomorrow, which may possibly be a million times harder. Or it may not. I don't know. But I do know that, like today, the Lord will help us make it through. He's been teaching me so much in these last two weeks, and not the least is just trusting Him, and leaning on His power.
These seem to be my life theme verses right now, so even though I've already shared them, I will do so again. Psalm 27:1,13-14, and II Cor 13:11; "The Lord is my light and salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; whom shall I dread?....I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord." "Finally, brethren, rejoice, be made complete, be comforted, be like-minded, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you."

Quietness.....

I can't get to sleep. I should, as I only had about four hours sleep in the last thirty-eight hours. Has it really been that long? This whole day ran together, melting into yesterday......This morning it was easy to get things done, it helped with the grief. I had other members in my family that couldn't cope this morning. So it was mainly me doing stuff. But by afternoon it was me that couldn't handle one more thing, and my sisters kicked back in. It has been such a blessing that my grandmother is here. She came for my sisters' graduation (which we are now postponing); she has helped remind me of the little things that need to be done. I would be content with just making sure meals were prepared and the house stayed relatively clean. But she's reminded me about sweeping the floors, and even that it should be about time to get another load of laundry in. Don't get me wrong, I'm not falling apart, but I guess I should say that she encouraged me to keep doing those everyday things that need to be done. And she actually took care of lunch today.
As I'm typing, I hear playing in the background MercyMe's The Love Of God. Such a beautiful song. And wonderful to be reminded of it, again and again......I don't know how the next couple weeks will play out, it will be hard; but one thing I do know, God is Evernear, Everloving, Comforting, Gracious and Compassionate, and He will guide us through this time.
Tomorrow, we will be celebrating Ms. Babs reunion with her King, and to be honest, I'm scared. I don't want to go through more possible pain. She played such a major role in my coming to know true worship; you could say she was the Lord's instrument in teaching me all that I know now. And it will be so hard without her. But I also know that the Lord will help me through it, and He may very well make it one of the most amazing experiences of my life.
I keep remembering all these wonderful times and experiences with her. I took vocal lesson's from her daughter (my self-adopted 'big sister'); and there'd be times when she was working away in the kitchen while I was having my lesson; I'd be singing something from My Fair Lady or Sound Of Music, and all of a sudden she would burst into song with me. Then she'd apologize, saying "I just couldn't help myself!" There was another time that she and Annie were going to New Orleans for a Hillsong tour, and graciously took me with them. We had a wonderful time, discussing worship, children, housekeeping, and the goodness of the Lord. I'll always remember those two days. I have to smile through my tears remembering, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I shall miss her so much, as will everyone in her family, our church body, community, and all those who came in contact with her. She was a woman who truly lived for the Lord, and for others.
I want to thank all those who have been praying for her these past five years, and for all the prayers lifted up for her family and those close to her left behind.

"Quietly, so quietly, I come before You, Lord. I see how much I need You, like I've never seen before......Strengthen, Lord, this pilgrim child. Sometimes my flesh is weak...But as I hush my hurried heart, I hear You tell me what to do. In repentance and rest is your healing, in quietness and trust is your strength."
Is. 30:15

When My Heart Fails Within Me, Thou, O Lord, Art With Me

"Because Your loving kindness is better than life, my lips will praise You. So I will bless You as long as I live; I will lift up my hands in Your name. When I remember You on my bed, I meditate on You in the night watches, for You have been my help, and in the shadow of Your wings I sing for joy. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me." Psalm 63:3,4,6-8
"Behold, God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid; for the Lord God is my strength and song, and He has become my salvation." Is. 12:2
"Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me....Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful." John 14:1,27
"'My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.'...Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong." II Cor. 12:9,10
"Finally, brethren, rejoice, be made complete, be comforted, be like-minded, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you." II Cor. 13:11

These are some of the verses the Lord led me to last night; as, like David, I "was weary with my sighs; I made my bed swim, I dissolved my couch with my tears." "But let all who take refuge in You be glad, let them ever sing for joy; and may You shelter them, that those who love Your name may exult in You." While I rejoice with those who have gone on to be with our wonderful Savior, my heart bleeds for those of us left behind; My eyes have wasted away with grief. I pray God's grace may abound exceedingly to the family, that He will indeed comfort and uphold them with His righteous right hand.

"Blessed Be The Name Of The Lord...Blessed Be Your Name.....You Give And Take Away....My Heart Will Choose To Say; 'Lord, Blessed Be Your Name'."

Wait For The Lord And Be Of Good Courage

So time drags on.......I'm waiting for my parents to get back in.....my grandmother's here right now, and most of my brothers...and it's not like I've never spent a night alone before....but I'm ready to see them again. I'll probably get off soon, and go read in my room as long as I'm able to hold up....This is a hard evening....

All these verses keep crowding into my head, a very good thing, and I'm so thankful that the Lord is bringing them to my remembrance. Also this one song, "I Will Lift My Eyes" by Bebo Norman. The Lord has really used that to help me lean on Him.
The verses I'm thinking of right now are Psalm 27- "The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the defense of my life; whom shall I dread? When evildoers come upon me to devour my flesh, my adversaries and my enemies, they stumbled and fell. Though a host encamp against me, my heart will not fear; though war arise against me, in spite of this I shall be confident. One thing I have asked from the Lord, that I shall seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord and to meditate in His temple. For in the day of trouble He will conceal me in His tabernacle; In the secret place of His tent He will hide me; He will lift me up on a rock. And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me, and I will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord. Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice, and be gracious to me and answer me. When You said, "Seek My face," my heart said to You, "Your face, O Lord, I shall seek."......Teach me Your way, O Lord, and lead me in a level path because of my foes......I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord."
That about sums it up.....

The Lord Will Be The Stability Of Your Times.....

Today, I got up by seven!!! OK, so not so impressive; but when you consider that it's been at least 8:30 to 9:00 this past week, I'm doing a lot better. I've just felt so wiped, and even when I have turned in early, can't get to sleep till after 12:00. That's probably why I can't get to sleep come to think of it, 'cause I'm sleeping in so late........
My sister's graduation party is tomorrow. My sister-in-law and I are supposed to be in charge of getting it all planned out, but to be honest, I'm not completely sure I've helped that much.
In a few minutes, I need to go water plants and the gardens. I'm praying for rain, as we're heading for another drought this summer otherwise. I also need to keep laundry going, make lunch, plan for supper, clean the kitchen in between, make sure the house is ready for my grandmothers arrival this afternoon, and get my room ready for her to stay in. I guess that means I'll be sleeping on the sofa in the living room or in my sisters room on the floor. And if I choose the living room, I need to vacuum out the sleeper sofa, and get clean sheets for it..... =) Ha ha.... I think I should have plenty to do today. I also might have to meet someone in town and help get some things set up for tomorrow....

These past few weeks have been rough. The Lord has really carried me through, but it seems every Wednesday I break down. I felt I could really identify with David in Psalm 6:2-7; "Be gracious to me, O Lord, for I am pining away; Heal me, O Lord, for my bones are dismayed. And my soul is greatly dismayed; But You, O Lord-how long? Return, O Lord, rescue my soul; Save me because of Your loving kindness. For there is no mention of You in death; In Sheol who will give You thanks? I am weary with my sighing; Every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears. My eye has wasted away with grief; It has become old because of all my adversaries." But Psalm 5:11 was comforting-"But let all who take refuge in You be glad, let them ever sing for joy; and may You shelter them, that those who love Your name may exult in You." And Psalm 105:1-4 "Oh give thanks to the Lord, call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples. Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; Speak of all His wonders. Glory in His holy name; Let the heart of those who seek the Lord be glad. Seek the Lord and His strength; Seek His face continually." Isaiah 35:3-4 "Encourage the exhausted, and strengthen the feeble. Say to those with anxious heart, 'Take courage, fear not. Behold, your God will come with vengeance; the recompense of God will come, but He will save you.'" Isaiah 33:6 "The Lord will be the stability of your times, a wealth of salvation, wisdom and knowledge."