October 2, 2007

So, here it is, October. OK, so it started yesterday. But it is October. The weather is getting cooler, the leaves are turning to orange, yellow and red-or that's what is supposed to be happening...true, the temperature does go down in the evenings, but about nine the next day, it starts warming back up; and the leaves are NOT turning. They're still green. Mostly.

I met a friend from college today for coffee, it was a really neat time. I enjoyed it so much, and hope she did too. :) We were able to share some verses with each other, and found a mutual love for Jonathon and his relationship with David. :)

I was reading in my bible today, looking up some verses on depression. Yes, I deal with depression sometimes; not the suicidal kind; but the 'down in the dumps today' kind. These are some of the verses I found:
Psalm 42:11-"Why are thou cast down, O my soul? And why art thou disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall yet praise Him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God."
Isaiah 26:3-"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee; because he trusts in Thee."
And here's a quote from C.S. Lewis that I found; "Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done..."
Too often, I try to rely on myself. It never works, but I seem to forget that each time I try it again. So here I am, again, after yet another failed attempt at relying on myself; resolving yet again to trust and rely on Christ.
Along with trust and reliance on oneself comes depression, I find, every time. The Lord isn't able to keep me in perfect peace when my mind isn't stayed on Him; when I'm not trusting in Him. And when I'm not in "Perfect Peace", you can bet I'm in depression. About my family, friends, house, myself and my life.
But "I shall yet praise Him, who is the health of my countenance, and my God" and I will "Hope in God", and I will 'stay my mind on Him' and 'trust in Him'. I shall choose to rely on God ''every day as if nothing had yet been done''.